Book Review – Enchantment: Awakening Wonder In An Anxious Age

Dear Reader,

Hello, there! I hope you are doing well. I am currently reading three books from the library right now (not counting graphic novels). Not on purpose! I was in line for one book that is 966 pages and, somehow, I bounced from about ninth to first in line within a week or so. I groaned because it didn’t seem possible to read this book (in which I cannot renew) and also two other books that are 200-something pages. But, because Enchantment: Awakening Wonder In An Anxious Age by Katherine May is an easy-read for me (like reading essays) and the other 200-something-pages book is a spiritual one, it is getting done. So, before I have to return all three of those books, I am striving to write about each one of them by this upcoming Tuesday.

I learned about Katherine May and her book entitled Enchantment from episode 220 of “We Can Do Hard Things” podcast with hostess Glennon Doyle (along with Abby Wambach and Amanda Doyle). She was the guest speaker.

Listen to the podcast by clicking here.

Read the transcript by clicking here.

One thing that I had read that I thought was deep in the book was how May realized why she was experiencing burnout. She had willingly surrendered her meditation time “because I thought it would be a vanity to demand it” (May, 2023, p. 50). So I thought to myself “how many of us do something similar and wonder why we are experiencing burnout?” May didn’t just give up meditation but also reading, time alone, hot baths, walking, silence, and standing in the garden at sunrise (2023, May). She replaced those things with work and “care” (May, 2023, p. 50). As a result, May found out that, without them, there was nothing left of herself (2023).

What Katherine May found out about present-day burnout is something that I can relate to—it showed her that she is ready to be made again (2023).

How have I allowed this great pleasure in my life—the act of sitting quietly with a book and drinking in its words—to become so heavy, so freighted with obligation? Somewhere along the line, I lost the sense of playfulness that drew me towards it in the first place. No wonder my reading went on strike.

Enchantment: Awakening Wonder In An Anxious Age (2023, p. 129)

According to May, one form of enchantment is play (2023). She mentioned she has been fascinated by how adults play.

Conventional wisdom says that most of us lose the thread of it, our minds greying alongside our hair. But that’s because we only recognise a certain kind of play, and so only associate playfulness with the adults who carry on doing the things that we expect children to do, like springing practical jokes and collecting stuffed toys. All that shows is our limited vocabulary for pleasure. It is either childlike—primary-coloured, messy, loud—or adult, dark and smoky, transgressive. These are only some of the ways it’s possible to play. Deep play—those big, immersive, unprofitable processes in which we invest our whole identity—is fundamental to me, and yet mine looks dry to the outside world, colourless.

Enchantment: Awakening Wonder In An Anxious Age (2023, p. 137)

The last thing I wanted to share is how May stated that childhood talent doesn’t necessarily translate to an adult one (2023). She had learned what happens when one turns away from play: bitterness, frustration, not feeling/being nurtured, and feeling strangled (May, 2023). If one has noticed such “symptoms,” please keep reading.

May, who is on the autistic spectrum, explained how, when she was a child, her type of play was with words and, like many autistic children, she grew up thinking that wasn’t the right kind of play (2023). She was urged to go outside, play with dolls, and run around but all she wanted to do was write (2023). (Side Note: to read more on what I had already written on how Katherine May describes how it is to be a woman on the autistic spectrum, click here). What I got from this is to find your type of play and do this often to avoid burnout. Get back into the wonder of the world in various elements: earth, water, fire, and air. These were the things that gave us a sense of wonder as a child. Unfortunately, as adults, we lose the sense of wonder due to adult-duties. The hope is that we can gain some of this wonder back.

To get a copy of Enchantment: Awakening Wonder In An Anxious Age by Katherine May, click here. To learn more about Katherine May, click here. To read her insight on autism, click here. For independent women that are searching for a resource on how to be safe while being on the autistic spectrum, I recommend The Independent Woman’s Handbook for Super Safe Living on the Autistic Spectrum by Robyn Steward (click here to read my book review).

Reference

May, K. (2023). Enchantment : awakening wonder in an anxious age. Riverhead Books.

Women And Autism

Dear Reader,

I how you are doing well. I have been attempting to return to my blog to share what I have gathered with the topic of women and autism. As I had written here, I have learned about Hannah Gadsby while listening to episode 82 of “We Can Do Hard Things” podcast with hostess Glennon Doyle (along with Abby Wambach and Amanda Doyle).

Listen to the podcast by clicking here.

Read the transcript by clicking here.

This was the first time I heard the word “neurotypical” and “neurodivergent.” Hannah Gadsby was the ones that stated both words. She is on the autistic spectrum and has written a book called Ten Steps to Nanette (click here to read my book review).

Many episodes later, Glennon Doyle had another woman who is on the autistic spectrum to speak on “We Can Do Hard Things” (episode 220). Her name is Katherine May. She is a New York Times bestseller author and, as Glennon stated she would like to be able to say, “she lives by the sea in Whitstable, England” (2023).

Listen to the podcast by clicking here.

Read the transcript by clicking here.

Katherine stated those that experience autism can hear, see, and feel a lot more things in comparison to someone who is neurotypical. For example, she stated she used to ask others if they can see the rainbows when light is reflected a certain way and has learned to stop asking because no one else could see the rainbows. Another example is hearing the humming of electronic items such as the buzzing or humming of a fluorescent light or a radiator. When it comes to touch, Katherine May stated she feels a feeling of an electric shock.

After listening to both podcast episodes with guest speakers Hannah Gadsby and Katherine May, I started to wonder if I am in the autistic spectrum. While growing up, I (as well as my family members) noticed I couldn’t stand being around bright lights as well as not liking loud sound for such a long time (I felt drained). Like May, I wanted to hide somewhere during parties (as in find a calm place that wasn’t so loud) or, if I forced myself to endure, I would feel so tired. I used to say it’s because I’m an introvert but when I kept pondering how too much touch throughout the day and noticing obsessively the humming that occurs in the room where others seem to be obvious of the noise caused me to think otherwise. The thing that really confirms it to me is what is called a meltdown. In hearing Katherine May’s (as well as Robyn Steward’s) definition, I stated “That explains my so-called outbursts that family members have often attempted to correct me while I was growing up.” May states it this way (2023):

But then, sometimes [extreme distress] really pushes you over the edge. You can get really upset or lose your temper. When you see autistic people having a meltdown or seeming to behave irrationally, we’re behaving in exactly the same way that a neurotypical person would if they had a loudspeaker blaring in their ear and having to wear a Velcro shirt turned inside-out or something. That’s the level of discomfort we’re at. When you see neurotypical people in pain, they react in exactly the same way, but for us, we’re at that threshold in just everyday life, and it’s just really, really difficult to cope with.

Why So Many Women Don’t Know They are Autistic with Katherine May (2023)

The final “hmm” for me (as in thinking I might be on the autistic spectrum) is not just feeling my own feelings so much but also feeling the feelings of others that are in the same room and also connecting how one person is having “beef” with another person. This is tiring and I often find myself saying “I’m going to take a nap” after being around my family for a long time (I even said it today but I decided to come to my blog before taking a nap). One small clip of demonstrating feeling so much feeling would be what I saw in Barbie movie; when Barbie was given the view of what it is to be human—seeing the light come through the leaves, hearing the laughter of others, and the other quick glances of things in life in which I cannot recall right now. I attempted to find the clip on YouTube but couldn’t find it. 😦

I would like to end this blog entry by sharing a song I found when creating a reel at Instagram. It’s called “Autism Speaks” by Kaylah Taylor.

To learn more about Katherine May and her insight on autism, click here. For independent women that are searching for a resource on how to be safe while being on the autistic spectrum, I recommend The Independent Woman’s Handbook for Super Safe Living on the Autistic Spectrum by Robyn Steward (click here to read my book review).

Reference

Doyle, G. (2023). Why So Many Women Don’t Know They are Autistic with Katherine May. Apple Podcasts Preview. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/220-why-so-many-women-dont-know-they-are-autistic-with/id1564530722?i=1000617648736